Oh boy. I think I’m going to adopt this as my new mantra. Or blog title.
Can’t you see it?
Enduring: Facing my fears through running…and running….and running
I've been scared of a lot of things in my life.
Heights. Decisions.
Boys. Money.
The Future. Puppets.
Commitments. Spending my life in school.
Quitting my job. Going back to school.
Running a full marathon. Choosing the right area of study.
Falling in love.
Change.
But you know how I combat those fears?
I often head out on a run.
It clears my head.
It makes me think.
It makes me stop thinking.
It helps me create.
It helps me see.
And it gives me endorphins which ultimately give me a high-on-life-nothing-is-going-to-scare-me moment.
And right now, I'm running.
I'm running in the mornings. I'm running in the evenings. I'm running double on the weekend. I'm running between classes.
I’m even running metaphorically.
Because I'm in this new uncharted territory. And I am in deep.
I'm scared I finally figured out what I want to do with my life vocationally but that I won't be good at it.
I'm scared to be in school for five to seven more years and not having a solid job (or time to work) during that timeframe to help us financially get through.
I'm scared to even apply to the school for the program I want to continue on in because the school is prestigious. And expensive. And it means I may have to commute. And what if I don’t get in?
I’m scared all the stress I used to have in school is going to resurface…and that Music Man will seriously think I’m crazy.
I'm ready to write my novel, but I'm scared to pen the words because what if no one likes it?
I'm scared of clicking the submit button on my marathon registration because that means I have to actually run 26.2 miles. And I have to figure out a way to turn the race weekend into a getaway weekend.
I'm scared of so many things right now, I often think I’m in the middle of a quarter life crisis. It’s real people. Seriously.
But when I breathe, I ask myself, if I don't fight my fears head on, how will I conquer them?
In the entire, short first chapter of Joshua, God tells him to be strong and courageous three times.
THREE.
I think I’m like Joshua. I really didn’t hear Him the first time. Or the second.
I have really got to start listening.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
-Joshua 1:9
Passing the Baton: How do you face your fears? Does running help you conquer them? What fears are you facing right now?
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Seek Peace. Choose Joy. Find Strong. Breathe Hope. Live Faith.